From the Heart

I’ve been writing Bus Stops for 3 years now this September. What I’ve written about has been situations that I’ve struggled with presently or throughout my life. I’ve always tried to write straight from my heart and based on what God has to say about these circumstances in His Word.

I don’t write these just for venting and expressing my opinion, but to share my failures and successes in hopes that you might find some answers as well from my experiences. I know that sometimes a certain one doesn’t apply to you, but the next one may.

This last week I have been trying to write and nothing happened. Usually when I write they just flow and are completed within 15 - 30 minutes. The reason I believe I’m struggling now is my heart has been empty. It’s been full of cynicism, apathy and a feeling of what’s the use. I’ve wrestled with the fear of disappointment all my life. So I fall into a belief that if I don’t try and can’t be disappointed.

Now I know all of this is a lie and nonsense. Nevertheless I sometimes do get overwhelmed with these feelings. Sometimes scriptures like Jeremiah 29:11 or Philippians 4:13 just make me angry instead of encouraged. Do any of you feel like this sometimes?

I’ve heard these verses used like catch phrases in a motivational seminar. If that is the way they are taught then that’s all they’ll ever be. All of God’s word cannot be interpreted in the mind, but only through our hearts. There are verses I’ve known since I was young that had no meaning until one day God spoke to me in a certain situation revealing in my heart a particular verse.

I know that God doesn’t work in the area of feelings, but only in the area of truth. Just because I feel a certain way rarely has nothing to do with the truth. There are many who have made a religion from following their feelings. That’s why I have to deny the lies of satan and return to the truth.

There are certain lies in our life that satan continues to perpetuate over and over. Why? Because they work! However, each time we deny those lies and move on we grow a little further away from them and closer to the truth. I know I feel really stupid each time I’m sucked into these negative tapes.

The only escape I’ve ever found is to believe the truth whether I feel in or not. If we believe the lie then we will begin to behave in that way. So why do we believe the lie? Simply because it’s easier. I know I’ve used this verse before and I know that I will use it again, but it is so true. “Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.” John 8:32