Good Intentions

Many of us have good intentions to do all kinds of different things in our life, but don’t quite get around to it. We had good intentions to pay that bill, but they didn’t care and charged us the late fee anyway. We had good intentions to get our tires changed, but that didn’t keep us from having that flat or call that friend and get that birthday card in the mail and didn’t realize that would have been the only card they got that day, but we failed even though we had good intentions.

Think back through history. What if they never quite got the Declaration of Independence completely finished or Dr. Martin Luther King had meant to march on Washington, but never got around to it. These are a couple of extreme examples, but what about the many times a day we have good intentions to do something that might of changed someone’s life but failed to do so, a simple phone call, a card or a visit.

We will not be judged on our good intentions, but on the things we followed through. I can’t help but think of the song that says, “The road to good intentions doesn’t lead to anywhere.” You may only get one chance to say what you needed to say, do what you needed to do or help those you needed to help.

Many times we believe we have all the time in the world to say or do what we need to do, but we forget to figure in the variables such as time, death, illness or many others situations. All of these could be you and not the other persons. If something happened to you today would your friends know how much you thought of them? Would you children and spouse know how much you loved them? Would you have gone to those places you keep telling others you are going to go to someday?

I know I have a problem with procrastination and putting things off as long as I can. I know this is my problem and if you can identify with me you can know you’re not alone. This is also something I continue to work on in my life. I don’t want to be a person of good intentions, but to be known as a person that didn’t let things go undone.

The Hostage

A man breaks into your home and holds you and your family hostage at gun point. He looks at you and says I’m about to make you a judge. You are going to decide which one of your children lives or dies. (If you don’t have any children, think of someone you love dearly) First you ask…Why are you doing this? What are you trying to accomplish or prove? He gives you no response. Again he demands you to decide and the only mercy he shows is to give you 5 minutes to make up your mind.

You scream at him, “This is crazy! We’ve done nothing to you! I can’t decide which of my children lives or dies because I love them all.” Then he says, “Then I will kill all of them and you have 3 more minutes.”

Then the man tells you that you have been making judgments all your life about people, about life and about God. So this should be easy for you with your experience. How many people have you destroyed in your mind? How many people have you looked down on because they were different than you? How many times have you told your spouse you were right? How many times have you told God something wasn’t fair or that He messed up? You see, you have been a judge for a long time and now I’m asking you to judge your children and decide which one lives or dies. You have 2 minutes.

All of them can’t be good kids. They have had to disappoint and even make you angry when they brought bad grades home from school, caused trouble with the neighbors or maybe they even sassed you. Finally you get to do something about it.

One child stands up seeing the anguish you’re going through and says, “You don’t have to decide, I’ll sacrifice myself if he will go away.” The man says this will be acceptable.

You have probably already seen the analogy, but if you haven’t let me help you. The man is sin and Satan. The accuser of the people and it’s by sin we are judged. Not by what we do, but by what we are. It ripped God’s heart out to see his people suffer because of his love for us. He didn’t want to decide which one lives with Him and which one didn’t. Jesus came forward and said, “I’ll sacrifice myself for them and make sin go away.” Some have declared they are going to figure their own way out of this situation by trying to look good enough to be accepted and others have been grateful for the sacrifice and accepted the gift. Ephesians 2:8-9 If you were to try to clean yourself up enough to be accepted by God is like giving a skunk a bath. No matter how many times you wash it, it’s still going to smell like a skunk.

5 More Minutes

How many times have we all said, “If I just had 5 more minutes” I could get to work on time, I could finish the project, we could win the game, I could make it to the gas station or I could pass the test. There are so many ways we could apply this statement.

There are so many things we could do that would take less than 5 minutes or may take seconds like…A kind word, to open the door, to listen or acknowledge someone. There’s probably not a worse feeling in this world than to not be noticed. How many times have we looked away to avoid noticing someone? Especially someone that isn’t pleasant to the eyes, in a wheelchair, walking on a cane or walker or maybe someone who is old. It would only take a few seconds.

So now, what could you do with people that come into your circle for 5 minutes? Many of us say we don’t have 5 minutes to spare. I know I waste more than 5 minutes a day so I can’t lean on that excuse and chances are you can’t either. I’m not trying to put anyone on a guilt trip. I just want you to think about it a little.

Yesterday my number 2 son Stephen (the paramedic) came home from work. He had been at the Hospital in McKinney where I had my surgery and he met the doctor who was in charge of resuscitating me. The doctor told him the policy for resuscitating someone was usually 15 minutes, but they had decided to go the extra 5 more minutes. The extra 5 more minutes would have decided my fate of life or death. My son thanked the doctor for saving his dad and for giving him the 5 more minutes. I learned some more interesting news from my niece this morning. My wife and the nurses were outside my room praying for me and the moment they said “Amen” I started breathing again.

None of us knows how much we impact the lives of others just by giving them a few minutes. I don’t know how many times I have said in the past that no one would even notice if I was gone. I know this is a false statement for me as it would be for you. I know my creditors would miss me.

Take a few moments and think what you could do with 5 more minutes.

Purpose/Hope

For some time now I’ve been teaching the need for purpose in our lives. We all search for that one-thing to make life meaningful. We dream of finding and fulfilling a need, stumbling along with best intentions trying various "purposes" on for size hoping someday to find "it" ...the one-thing that makes life worthwhile.

We all have a purpose: Taking care of our children, going to work, helping each other are all purposes. Some have said my purpose was to "keep chairs from floating away," implying that I sat around on my rump for hours on end. I could take issue with that but, I'll save that for another time.

What if you were confined to a bed? A wheelchair? Limited by a walker? Could you still have a purpose? When faced with a debilitating injury and life shifts with tornadic velocity, is your purpose gone? The answer is "No!” Even if you are on complete bed rest you serve a purpose. That purpose may be to let someone else take care of you. Someday you may find yourself unable to do some of the things that today you take for granted. I have several new friends who have lost their independence and even the ability to eat is a struggle. Do they have purpose? The answer is, "Of course!" One of the most encouraging things I heard a lady say, "Even if I were bedfast and couldn’t move my arms and legs, I would change the world through prayer." Changing the world through prayer...sounds like a great purpose to me.

Years later I learned that purpose has a cousin named "Hope". I came to understand that purpose is not enough to get you out of bed in the morning. You can have a purpose and still feel like life isn’t worth living. You can be busy doing exceptional things, reaching the multitudes, and not have a driving force behind your purpose. What I learned that was missing in my life was “HOPE.” I had purpose and I even had a dream, but I didn’t have hope. I had lost it somewhere in the shuffling of my life.

To find your passion and dream may involve some risk as in the mouse trap. The cheese is not the purpose. The purpose is a full belly. The cheese is the hope and the trap is the risk. I know in this time in our world it may be hard to see much hope, but I don’t have to change the world nor do I want to. I’m only called to work in my corner of it or my circle.

There is the famous scripture that says, “Faith is the substance of things hoped for and the evidence of things not seen.” Hebrews 11:1. What does this mean to you? It’s not only hoping for something, but believing you will receive it. Faith/Hope is what gives you the excitement to seek your passion. This is what will get you out of bed in the morning.

If your passion and excitement come from your job, then I say, Wonderful! If your passion comes from being the best Husband/Wife/Father/Mother, that’s great. I can get excited when someone is passionate about their job even if it's boring to me and I don’t understand what they’re talking about. It’s so refreshing to see someone excited and positive.

If you’ve lost hope, then it’s probably right where you left it. Go back. Pick it up. And get moving again.

The Tide

When I was released from the hospital the doctor told my wife that I could most likely expect some depression as a common response from the heart surgery. When she told me this information I was somewhat defiant. I had done the depression thing 10 years ago and I wasn’t going to do it again.

Now that I had the foreknowledge of this possible depression I arrogantly started building my fortress and I was ready to fight. I have written a book on depression, therefore I thought I knew everything I needed to know.

Needless to say, my fortress didn’t withstand the oozing of depression under the doors. I was going down and I didn’t understand what was happening. The tools I had used in the past were not working this time.

Last Tuesday evening I went with my wife to her college class. I had 3 hours to do some thinking, and then as I realized I was alone, alone with my thoughts. I reviewed the details of my life and the last few weeks. I could not conjure up one good reason why I was feeling depressed. Many great things were happening in my life and there was no really good reason to be down. The only answer was that these feelings were physiological, not spiritual and not just my emotions. Understanding this alone, after some wrestling with pride I actually took comfort in accepting this new concept.

My wife and I spoke about this new revelation on the way home and she made the suggestion that I gave the depression a new status. It was no longer the monster I had created in my mind. I had now turned this problem into something smaller I could possibly deal with and had a chance of conquering.

That was when I realized my depression is more like “The Tide” going in and out and not the tidal wave I had been expecting to crash down around me at any instant. Imagine for a moment how the tide moves in and out. If you have ever been to the Pacific coast then you can understand the power of the tide. It has nearly as much force pulling back as it first did when it came in. This is where I had to stand firm and not allow the sand to shift beneath my feet causing me to be pulled down without a chance to get my stability for the next wave, or possibly being taken back with the force of the water. The Pacific coast has a lot of riptides and if I would have allowed myself to be pulled in and continued to fight I would have found myself pulled out farther to sea and overcome by the constant movement. The only way to resist a riptide is to stay calm and go with the flow and eventually you’ll return to the beach.

I had to realize the “Truths” of my situation and to stand firm on the truth until the tide receded and things returned to normal. I have to admit the last few days have been much better and I can see the tide returning to sea. Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place. Ephesians 6:13-14

Ask yourself these questions and be honest and truthful…

1. Do I have any friends?
2. Do I have any talents or abilities?
3. Am I loved?
4. What are my good points?
5. Do I care about others?
6. Do I have a good heart?

If you answered truthfully yes to any of these questions when the tide comes in, just be patient for the tide to return back to sea. During this time stand firm on the truth. Realizing only real truth comes from God’s Word. I’ve attached the truths God says about you to help when you are feeling the crashing and pulling of the next bout of the tide. The truth is not based on feelings.

When I had acknowledged and accepted my situation I have to agree that this wasn’t my only bout with depression in the last 10 years. I have had several over the years that I had refused to acknowledge as depression. I called it discouragement, under the weather, anxiety and many other names. I didn’t want to admit I still had this problem occasionally. Admitting depression would be like admitting defeat when I thought I had overcome this so called monster.

You may have found yourself in this same situation or with others close to you. This principle of reducing problems in your life isn’t just with depression. We need to see fear, worry and many other struggles by reducing them to there actual size. Don’t give them the power to control who you really are.

When I first learned of my depression at first I looked at it as a blank check. In other words, anytime I felt like I didn’t want to be responsible, or I wanted to do something wrong I would play my depression card. I was a victim I had an excuse to get away with anything. Wrong! As long as I remained a victim I could try to use this to do whatever I wanted. I always paid a price for this. Now, I believe, I’m a survivor and not a victim. I am still responsible for my feelings, actions, beliefs and daily responsibilities.

The great thing about the tide is that it may come in, but from just watching I know it will be returning back. I need to have God as my center and my truths at hand and plant them in my heart so I can stand firm and not be open to being pulled in the down direction.